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Cultivating Grateful Hearts: Teaching Our Kids to Give Thanks

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The Entitlement Problem

We noticed our kids were starting to say "I want..." and "I need..." a lot more than "Thank you."

Birthday parties meant expectations. Christmas became about the wish list. Even daily blessings were taken for granted.

We realized we needed to intentionally cultivate gratitude in our home.

Why Gratitude Matters

"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." - 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Gratitude isn't just good manners - it's a spiritual discipline that:

  • Shifts our focus from what we lack to what we have
  • Recognizes God as the source of all blessings
  • Protects against entitlement and greed
  • Increases joy and contentment
  • Honors God

Our Gratitude Practices

1. Thankful Jar

We keep a jar on the kitchen counter with slips of paper and pencils. Throughout the week, family members write down things they're thankful for and drop them in.

Every Friday evening, we read them all together. It's become our favorite family tradition!

2. Bedtime Gratitudes

Before prayers each night, everyone shares three things they're thankful for from that day. We call them:

  • A big blessing
  • A small blessing
  • A surprise blessing

3. Thank You Notes

Our kids write thank you notes for:

  • Gifts received
  • Acts of kindness
  • Teachers and mentors
  • Family members

We provide pre-stamped cards and make it part of our routine.

4. Gratitude Walks

On family walks, we point out things God has given us:

  • Trees providing shade
  • Birds singing
  • Flowers blooming
  • Neighbors waving
  • Our working bodies

5. Comparison Fasting

We're teaching the kids to notice when they're comparing (and complaining):

  • "Why does she get..."
  • "His is better than mine..."
  • "That's not fair..."

When we catch it, we pause and find three things to be thankful for instead.

Making Gratitude Visible

We've created visual reminders throughout our home:

  • Gratitude Tree - Paper leaves with blessings written on them
  • Photo Wall - Pictures of people and things we're grateful for
  • Blessing Box - Small items representing answered prayers
  • Alphabet Gratitude - Finding something to thank God for from A-Z

Teaching Gratitude in Hard Times

This is the hardest but most important part. When things don't go as planned:

  • "I'm disappointed I didn't make the team, but I'm thankful for..."
  • "I'm sad about this, but I'm grateful that..."
  • "This is hard, but God is still good because..."

We're teaching them that gratitude doesn't deny pain - it finds God's presence in the midst of it.

The Transformation We're Seeing

Over the past year, we've noticed:

  • Less whining and complaining
  • More contentment with what they have
  • Spontaneous thank-yous
  • Recognition of God in daily life
  • Joy even in small things

Last week, our youngest lost a toy and said, "That's sad, but I'm still thankful for my other toys." Progress!

Start Simple

You don't need elaborate systems. Just start with:

  1. One gratitude question at dinner
  2. Modeling thankfulness yourself
  3. Pointing out blessings as you see them

Gratitude is contagious - when we practice it, our kids will too!

A Grateful Heart Knows God

Know God as the giver of all good gifts. Love God with thankful hearts. Serve God by appreciating His blessings and sharing them with others.

How do you teach gratitude in your family?

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